Anderson Cooper should stick to being Kathy Griffin’s chortling foil on New Year’s Eve. Apparently actual analysis of the actual news is well outside his skillset. We speak of this Cooper outburst after civil-rights warrior and Congressman John Lewis said that Donald Trump will not be a legitimate president:

I get he doesn’t like Donald Trump. I get he doesn’t accept the results of the election, but is this helpful in any way?… If a Republican had said this about President-elect Hillary Clinton, Democrats would be up in arms.

So Anderson Cooper is an idiot. Here’s why.

  1. Hypocrisy

Could it really have escaped Cooper that Republicans have spent the last eight years questioning the legitimacy of the President of the United States with nary a peep from Democrats? Democrats never get up in arms. About anything. And speaking of up in arms, we await the video of Anderson Cooper freaking out about Donald Trump’s one-man, long-form shitshow.

  1. Assuming facts not in evidence

Sorry to get all lawyerly here, but we might be better off if talking heads like Cooper proffered evidence once in a while rather than providing us with nothing but their rank conjecture. What is the basis of Cooper’s claim? The Chimps can only speak for themselves: we’d be “up in arms” if Hillary Clinton were about to take the presidential oath under the shadow cast by credible evidence that a) a hostile foreign power had set her up and “sexually compromised” her while watching on closed-circuit TV, OR b) her campaign had actively colluded and conspired with a hostile foreign power to commit espionage against the United States by corrupting a presidential election. The Chimps, in fact, just talked to each other on the phone and agreed that, given either accusation by a credible British spy, we’d only be “up in arms” if Hillary were not replaced on the Capitol’s West Front at noon on January 20 by Tim Kaine. As to any Republican claim under those circumstances that Hillary would not be a legitimate president, we’d be in hearty agreement.

  1. False equivalency

We’re really tiring of this. Cooper suggests that calling Donald Trump illegitimate is somehow the same thing as calling Hillary Clinton illegitimate (or, more precisely, would have been the same had she won). This ignores that Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton could not be more different. One is a personality-disordered buffoon with compromised cognitive, psychological, and emotional faculties and the moral compass of a disoriented jungle predator. The other is a boring policy wonk whose big sin in public life was that she proved inexpert as to archaic State Department email protocols. She also happens to be intelligent, articulate, experienced, and vetted beyond all reason.

Were Hillary Clinton as compromised as Donald Trump in any of the many senses in which he is compromised, it would be Republicans who would be up in arms about her impending inauguration, and guess what – Democrats would be right there with Republicans. Because they’d be right.

For his three anti-intellectual sins, we award Anderson Cooper one Laughing Chimps Salute: